


Oh no, not you

by Trams



Series: Ficlet collection [2]
Category: DCU (Comics), Green Lantern (Comics)
Genre: Ficlet, Humor, M/M, Originally Posted on Tumblr, bordering on crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-31
Updated: 2016-07-31
Packaged: 2018-07-28 12:23:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,462
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7640029
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Trams/pseuds/Trams
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Guy and Hal bicker a lot. And Guy realizes he's in love wih Kyle.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Oh no, not you

**Author's Note:**

> Hal is a lot more fun to wtite than I though he'd be

They had responded to a distress call to the green lantern corps, which had turned out to be a trap. Guy and Hal had barely arrived on the planet when there had been a concussive blast throwing them to the ground. Strong and thick, metal cuffs had been put around their hands, which gave off a strange dampening field which interferred with their rings. After being transported to a large building, which had looked like a massive storage facility, Guy and Hal had been chained back to back and thrown into a deep hole in the ground. Whenever Guy or Hal had asked the aliens who captured them, the only response they got was that they were going to be brought to a trial and then executed. Not a very promising prospect, however Guy was sure that at some point theyd manage to escape, but then Guy started thinking about Kyle.

He and Kyle had been sort of dating for a few months. They thought if it as “sort of” because they'd already been spending most of their time together and the only thing that had changed was that now they had sex too. Guy liked this new version of their relationship. He liked it a lot, but now he wondered how Kyle would react if Guy didn't come back. What if Guy did in fact die here, what if there wasn't a last minute escape like all the other times and Guy was actually killed on this backwater planet of decitful aliens with a grudge against green lanterns? How would Kyle react? Would he even find out what had happened or would Guy just disappear and he'd never find out the truth? He didn't think he could handle it if it was the other way around. If Kyle just ddisappeared one day and Guy never found out what had happened. Guy needed Kyle, he was the most important person in Guy's life, and Guy loved spending time with him. That was when Guy had the realization.

“Oh this is not the time or place for this realization,” Guy said, surprising even himself by speaking out loud because he hadn't meant to.

“What?” Hal asked.

“I'm in love,” Guy said, because if he had already started blurting out things then why stop now.

There was a short pause and then Hal said.

“You're right. Flattering as it is. This is a terrible time to reveal your love for me.”

Guy frowned.

“Not you, you idiot. Kyle.”

“I know that, I was trying to make a joke.”

“Haha, very funny. Leave the jokes to the comedians, Jordan. We have to get out of here.”

“Yes, of course we do,” Hal said, in that frustrating, calm, tone of voice that seemed to imply that Guy had just said something stupid. “But I don't see why your little realization would make it even more urgent that we get out of here. We'll just wait until the trial they keep talking about and escape then instead.”

“No, we can't wait.” Guy said. He had just reaized something else, or at least had a growing suspicion. “I just realized that I'm in love with Kyle. Hell, I even admitted it out loud. I bet right at this moment a star sapphire is on their way here to rescue us to save love or whatever their mission statement is.”

“I should know it,” Hal said. “Carol told me about it, but I don't remember,” Hal mumbled.

“And people wonder why you crazy kids can never make it work,” Guy said. “Whatever, I am not going to be rescued until I've least tried to save myself.”

“Right then, let's get out of here,” Hal said, followed by a short pause of silence. “Any suggestions for how?”

Guy frowned again and looked up at the opening of the hole.

“Well, we are tied up back to back, in a cramped hole, I suppose we could try that thing where we walk up the sides,” Guy said.

“Sounds brilliant, not so sure it'll work.”

“Then what do you suggest?” Guy asked, annoyed at Hal for shooting down his suggestion like that. It hadn't been a good plan, but it couldn't have hurt to try it. “The cuffs are preventing us from using our rings. I can't believe they figured out a dampening field that can affect the rings.”

Hal made a contemplative sound from behind Guy.

“What?” Guy asked.

“Are we sure they were actually successful? I mean we are green lanterns, surely our willpower should beat a dampening field?”

Guy felt himself start to smile.

“Worth a try. Let's pour on the willpower.”

Up top, not too close to the edge of the hole two guards were seated at a table playing the intergalactic version of strip poker. One of the guards was clearly loosing and had been forced to stip down to underwear. When suddenly a bright green light came bursting up through the hole in the ground.

“What?” said the guard in only his underwear.

“Oh that can't be good,” the other guard said and rose reaching out to grab his blaster, which looked a lot like a long sword rather than the projectile weapon it was. Before he could lift his blaster though, one of two green fists came shooting up from the hole and knocked him out, the other fist connected with the second guard's head and he too was knocked out. A second later Guy and Hal came flying up through the hole and landed on the floor.

“That was easy,” Hal said. At the same time as a third guard, wearing pants but no shirt, came inside the room carrying three bottles. He dropped the bottles and grabbed what looked like a remote control, pressing one of the buttons before the green fist from Guy's ring hit him in the face knocking him over. A loud blaring noise started to sound all over the place.

“I think they know we've escaped,” Guy said.

“No shit,” Hal replied.

Having no way of knowing which way to run, and only one door to chose from, they ran through that door and out into a long corridor which they ran down. At the end of it were two doors to either side. Hal opened the left one and they burst through it before looking what was on the other side. The room they entered was a locker room, unfortunately it wasn't empty. Three guards were in the process of quickly pulling on their gear. Hal and Guy came to a standstill. The guards, one of them even in the process of reaching for his rifle, also stopped what they were doing and just stared in surprise.

“Hi guys,” Hal said, meanwhile Guy punched the closest guard in the face. Hal made a construct and pushed the two remaining guards into the lockers, with such force they were dented and it made a lot of noise.

Hal and Guy started tying up the guards, when Guy suddenly thought he heard something. He looked up at the still open door, which Hal his his back towards. A guard was coming into view, blaster in hands he aimed it straight for Hal's back. Guy created a shield behind Hal's back. The blaster fired, with a whining noise, but it hit the shield. Hal spun around, made a green construct fist and punched out the guard.

“Getting slopping in your old age,” Guy said with a grin.

“I know you always watch my back,” Hal said, and started to leave the room, but looked over his shoulder and said: “You covet my ass.”

“I do not!” Guy protested. But Hal had already left the room, Guy followed. “The only ass I covet is Kyle's,” he said, and followed it up with: “The things I've done to that ass,” in a contemplative tone, and smiled.

“Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!” Hal, protested and walked through the other door.

On the other side was another corridor, it was empty, but the alarm was still blaring. They started running again. Reaching a t-junction where they could either run straight ahead or turn right.

“We're turning,” Hal shouted.

“No, let's keep going!” Guy protested. They were still a few steps away, when two guards came around the corner to their right. They were holding their blasters, but didn't have time to fire, before Guy in two strides reached one of the guards and punched him in the face. Hal too opted not to use the rign and gave the other guard a powerhul right hook, which made the guy stumble into the guards Guy had punched further disrupting that alien's balance and the two crashed into the wall. Hal and Guy quickly tied them up and left them there.

Guy looked at Hal who looked back at him.

“Shall we?” Guy said and pointed down the corridor ahead of them. Hal only hesitated for a second before he nodded.

“Sure,” he said. They continued running. They hadn't gotten far when Guy thought he heard something, despite the loud alarm. He looked over his shoulder and spotted a guard running towrds them from behind. Guy jumped to the side of the corridor, against the wall.

“Duck!” he shouted to Hal, who to Guy's surprise didn't even hesitate and just ducked. A blaster shoot came flying over Hal's head, and past Guy. He turned and with a construct hand pushed the guard with some force against the wall.

“This is the second time I've saved your life today, Jordan. You owe me,” Guy siad as they continued to jog down the corridor.

“Aw, you do like me a little bit,” Hal said. “You should just admit that you love me deep down.”

Guy gave him an angry look, but Hal didn't see it.

“I love Kyle,” Guy grumbled. “And only Kyle!”

“Shhh, the Star Sapphires' will hear you.”

“Shut up Jordan.”

They continued to run through corridors trying to find away out, but the place a was a labyrinth. So far their escape hadn't been met with much resistance, when they had been captured there had been so many aliens they had easily overpowered Hal and Guy, but now their numbers were nowhere near the same. That was until the corridor they had been running through opened up into an octangular room with four doors, all doors were open and occupied by a lot of guards all aiming their blasters into the middle of the room.

Hal immediately raised a shield catching the first blasts coming their way. Guy aimed his ring, pouring his willpower into the shield as well. Guy and Hal could fire through the shield, but whenever someone seemed to fall he was immediately replaced by another alien behind him, and bodies started to pile up in front of the doors, shielding the aliens.

“We need to get out of here,” Hal shouted to Guy.

“Oh, do we? I had no idea,” Guy said, with maybe a bit more sarcasm than Haln's comment had warranted, but Guy was losing interest in this escape. He just wanted to get back to Oa and Kyle. “You are such a brilliant leader always full of great ideas. It's thinking like that which makes me see why people keep claiming you're so great.”

“Will you just shut up,” Hal muttered and shot Guy an annoyed look, before he looked up at the ceiling.

“Why didn't we think of that,” Hal suddenly exclaimed. Guy looked over at him.

“What?”

Hal pointed up. Guy looked u at the ceiling, but didn't see anything.

“What?” He asked again.

“We could just punch through the ceiling and leave,” Hal explained. Guy started to grin.

High up in the air above the planet the star sapphire known as Yrra Cynril, and also known as Fatality was descending towards the planet's surface, when suddenly there was a loud explosion and she could see two figures come flying through the air at high speed and chased by twenty or thirty ships flying after them. She suddenly had a worrying surpicion that the two being chased were the reason she was here. She stoppe and just floated in the air, watching and waiting.

When the two figures being chased came closer she realized that she recognized them, and Yrra said the only thing any rational person would say upon seaing Guy Gardner and Hal Jordan tear through the air chased by an army: “Oh no, not you two.” For a second she considered just leaving, but she suspected that no matter how much hurt Hal had caused Carol over the years she wouldn'd actually forgive Yrra for leaving Hal.

Guy and Hal came to a stop right next to her in the air.

“Yrra, how about you teleport us away from here?” Hal said smiling that smile he probably thought was charming but with the manic glint in his eyes he just looked too crazy to be truly charming.

“Yeah, take me to my one true love,” Guy shouted. His face was sweaty, there was what she assumed to be blood even though it was purple spattered on one of his cheeks, and he was grinning looking happy as a pig in mud. She really had been spending too much time with Earthlings, using their idioms now too.

“You the one I'm here for?” She asked. Guy nodded. “I can't believe this,” she mumbled. She aslo wasn't going to go into how it wasn't actually teleportation, because they were never going to listen, and there wasn't time.

A second later the twenty-five ships chasing the green lanterns came to an abrupt stop, the aliens wondering where their prisoners had disappeared to. Lightyears away in a studio on Oa, Kyle was putting the finishing touches on a painting of the Oan skyline when suddenly the painting and himself was bathed in a bright pink light and less than a second later Guy was standing in front of him, with Hal and Yrra as well, but as always Kyle mostly had eyes for Guy.

“Guy,” Kyle exclaimed, happy and surprised.

“Kyle,” Guy exclaimed as well before pulling Kyle up to his feet, embracing him and kissing him.

Meanwhile Hal turned to Yrra.

“Could you give me a lift to earth?” Hal asked.

“No,” Yrra said, and flew out through the open balcony door.

“Uhm,” Hal said. He turned to Guy and Kyle but they were still kissing. “Bye,” Hal said, only a little bit awkward before he too flew out through the balcony door. He supposed he was happy for Guy and Kyle. They were good for each other. Hal flew off to find John and tell him about the new developments in Kyle and Guy's relationship.


End file.
